So many questions

So many questions no answers

The weight of the troubles doesn’t transfer

Whenever I try make it right I make blunders
The ache in my heart strike me like a thunder

Waking up, I feel exhausted
I face these demons, they are traumatic
So scary that I am repeatedly haunted
There’s nothing like feeling unwanted

It’s my destiny that I hate
Can’t complain, they say it’s my fate
My head spins when I walk on the road
Legs tremble so I crawl on the floor

Shoulders are heavy now
I try to get up but I only go down
I see the sun and hope to see sunshine
I am in hell yet I say I am just fine

So many questions but no answers
I want to see a bouquet but I see dead flowers
I want to break free and scream out on top of a tower

This is not a game
Success doesn’t mean fame
My identity is my name
Why should I be afraid to be me? Why should there be any shame?

So many questions but no answers
I’ll ask them hundred times but to no avail
I’d want to succeed and not fail
Even if it means walking on hot flames

So many questions but no answers
Joy has vanished there’s only anger
I am an amateur but I want to be a master
That’s why I take shortcuts and like to cut to the chase faster

Now I know this is not the right way 
I’ll have to work night and day
There are questions and there will be answers
If only I rebuild after suffering this disaster

Need to be patient to remain sane
Take it as a boon and not a bane
It’s my story and I am the main character
Can’t back down, I’ve to fight like a wrestler.

I hide in my shell 
Because outside has become hell
People around me do wish me well
Life becomes harder when you have no friend.


Are you a night owl or an Early Bird?


First of all, I am not calling you an owl or a bird if you haven’t figured out the meaning of it yet. A night owl is someone who tends to stay up late at night or in simple expression, we can say, someone who does not like to sleep early. An early bird, as you must’ve known or if not, then you’d have probably guessed it already, is someone who likes and tends to sleep early and wake up early the next morning. Our elders, our teachers and just about every other person we know, always advice us that it is advantageous to sleep early as it provides ample amount of benefits and makes you more energetic as well as enthusiastic during the day. From last few years, I have developed a habit of staying up late. A lot of people now a days have developed this habit because of the internet. It is quite addictive, right? Well, there are so many other reasons as well though besides surfing the internet all night long till twilight knocks on the door of another wonderful day. Like, one can be you’re being chatting with your significant other who is living some distance from you due to work and you’re missing him/her so badly that you can’t resist but to talk and you’re just so unable to let go. You just keep on tossing and turning the whole night and before you realise, the night has bid good bye already and you sit there on your bed worrying how would you spend an entire restless day at the office.

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One more reason can be that your mind is active only during the night. This is something which I also experience every night while I’m in bed with a blanket covering me from head to toe and hoping the sleep-fairy will put me into a deep sweet-sound sleep and fetch me a sublime dream. Alas! It just never happens. Maybe, my sleeping schedule needs a bit of work and rescheduling. But, for some reason, over the last few years I’ve apparently become a night owl. I have noticed that it is actually a lot easier to do creative tasks at the moment during which the silence seems more beautiful and comforting as well as soothing even than a musical masterpiece from a well-known musician as it makes you feel calm and you are desperately waiting for that shimmering ray of sunlight which is also craving to fall onto the glass table through the window which will be wide open soon as the chilly blows of wind will fade away somewhere you wouldn’t be able to meet them until the evening. It has been psychologically proven that your mind is more active during the night than during the day as well. it just makes every creative task a lot easier and peaceful to do at night. So, I wonder if I can find someone who is exactly same as me or have a similar kind of lifestyle as mine. I will keep on wondering until I find somebody.

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